We have a cat that lives with us. People call her the “fattest cat I’ve ever seen!” She’s really NOT that fat compared to some other cats I’ve met in my life but she is fat, and not only is she fat but she holds her weight really strangely for a cat. It’s all in her belly. Her belly hangs way down and is all wobbly, like she needs a tummy tuck but her front portion is normal cat looking. When she sits down she looks like a Heresy’s Kiss. She is also a gray stripped cat just adding to the allusion.

This is the cat that has been marking in the house. Husband says that he wants to get rid of her…well both the cats, or so he says. I think if it really came down to it he wouldn’t get rid of them because let’s face it, it’s been almost two years now that we’ve been dealing with cat pee in the house. We’re about to rip up our laundry room because of pee-body and the only “discussion” of getting rid of the cat(s) is a “I’m going to throw them out side and never let them back in.” At this point I just roll my eyes when he says he’s going to get rid of the cats. *However* unless one of the kids brings home a stray we will NEVER go out and find a cat. Ever. We will be stuck with these two for a good long time since they are only six(ish) and well, cats live forever.

Because of the pee-ing in the house I’ve started to let her outside, we would let her outside with supervision perviously, now I just let her roam around outside. Thankfully she doesn’t roam much further than our yard straying into the neighbors on either side, but staying close enough that I can shake the treat bag out the door and she’s there in a jiffy. She also loves it when anyone comes out side with her. She follows whoever is outside, if we’re doing yard work she’ll lounge in the driveway, or flop down in front of you as you’re trying to do the task you went outside to do. So excited, like a dog when you go in the yard and they think you are coming out only to play with them, that is our cat.

The cats (who’s name is Turdface) is lounging in the driveway as I’m trying to sweep. Toddler is chasing the cat with a stick, since the cat was lounging obviously she was not too concerned about the small one with the stick. Then the neighbor kid came out…I shouldn’t say kid, young adult? They are driving now, driving! Makes me feel old. Young adult neighbor comes out with a book and a blanket, proceeds to put blanket down and then sit upon blanket to read their book. The cat seeing this, immediately gets up from her lounging about the driveway and trots over to the neighbor, crashes her head into the neighbor’s arm and then flops over as if to say “oooooOOOOOOHHHHHH pet me! PET ME! I’m soooooooooo neglected!”

I was standing in the driveway watching this all unfold. I then tried to call the cat back, even going over and picking the cat up and brining her back into the yard. The cat ran back to neighbor and went back to posturing for pettings. I apologized but neighbor didn’t seem to mind petting the cat. I figured that eventually the cat would get bored and move on, since cats are fickle creatures. But, no. Turdface thought the neighbor was her new BFF and was not going to leave her alone. After a few minutes I had to go get the treat back and shake it at her. That got her attention and made her come running, then I scooped her up and tossed her back in the house.

I was somewhat embarrassed about my cat, although more because we don’t really get along with the neighbors more than my cat acting like a spoiled cat that thinks everyone is there for her own amusement and giving her attention.


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